Finding humor in kids & chaos

Word Finder? Say What?

Here is the list of words that I made up (all by myself) and am letting you use FOR FREE! You will feel so much smarter when you use these words in a sentence and smugly watch as others try to place them, but can't. 

Now go forth and dazzle...

Mamacoma-‚Äč the near unconscious state that envelops mothers on the rare occasion that they are treated to any significant stretch of sleep. It is not unlike passing out from alcohol consumption except you never went anywhere or had any fun.

How to use in a sentence:

"I swear when I go to bed tonight I am hoping to fall into a mamacoma."

Sweatmones- the combination of sweat and hormones that befalls teenage boys and creates a smell powerful enough to peel paint from the walls. This smell is only recognizable to non-teenage boys.

How to use in a sentence:

"My car is like a stink bomb on wheels what with all those sweatmones."

Toontake- the rapid fire, head swiveling maneuver of every mother trying to see who else is around and may have witnessed the embarrassing, horrific behavior of offspring in public.  The motion is similar to that of the cartoon double-take reminiscent of Daffy Duck's animated days. 

How to use in a sentence:

"I was so relived that the toontake revealed no one witnessed Junior wipe a booger on the on the Church's stained glass window."

Swearversions- the hybrid that ends up coming out of your mouth when you begin to swear in front of your kids but then change up the word instead. Most swearversions begin with the letter 'F' to avoid the most adverse word of all. I have actually used "fuglidity" and it is a perfect example. 

How to use in a sentence:

"Swearversions don't make you feel as good as real swear words do."

Flashpan- the total panic that engulfs you as you realize that you are about to have a hot flash at the most inconvenient time EVER. This would include while speaking in public, job interview or review or any time you are around a younger, less sweatier mom who has decades to go before hot flashes are a reality.

How to use in a sentence:

" I went into a total flashpan the minute I walked into Pilates class."

Textation-  the mortification you feel after realizing you sent a text that autocorrected you into stupidity or profanity. 

How to use in a sentence:

"When I realized I said "dick" instead of "duck" I wanted to die of textation.